By HELLEN CHEN
LOS ANGELES — In a 2013 survey carried out by Siemens that involved 2000 adults, 60 percent of those questioned said it took just 10 weeks to know that someone was Mr. or Mrs. Right.
Yet most singles are postponing marriage in America and it usually take years to date a person. The time of dating has become longer and longer with no commitment to marriage, thus opening the door for eventual breakups.
Valentine’s Day to some singles has become a “revolving door” situation.
Jasmine C from Los Angeles has been seeking to settle down for a number of years. She was divorced for over 10 years and is now in her early 40s. She met a man whom she fell in love with and was sure she would be marrying him.
The first Valentine’s Day they had celebrated together was the most beautiful she had ever experienced. Christmas was romantic as well.
The relationship lasted only one and a half year as her now ex-boyfriend expressed no intention to get married and would like to keep the relationship “open” with no commitment. Before the second Valentine’s Day, it was over.
According to bestselling author and relationship master, Hellen Chen, this is an all-too-typical revolving door story.
Chen said. “It is great to celebrate Valentine’s Day together with your date. But what is the purpose if comes the next Valentine’s Day or Christmas, this person is no longer there?”
Chen, who is known for her no-nonsense approach to having a happy marriage, has her advice featured in over 200 publications and interviews in over 18 countries.
Her latest book, “Hellen Chen’s Love Seminar” has become the number one bestselling relationship and marriage book at Barnes and Noble.
Chen observed, “No matter which country I fly to in the world, the phenomenon is the same. 85% of dating with no marriage commitment end up in breakups.”
“There are only 2 endings to a relationship: marriage or breakups. If there is no intention to get married in the first place, most singles are simply wasting their time. Over some time, the flaws of their dating partners will only get magnified and the relationship will break.” said Chen in her recent Los Angeles Love Seminar she was giving to singles who come to her wanting to find “perfect matches.”
Chen noted the world-wide phenomenon of delayed marriages and yet increased divorces. She mentioned in a recent radio interview that “increased dating time to know a person did not increase the longevity of marriages in America.”
“The solution to reducing the high divorce rate is not delaying marriage but increasing one’s knowledge on how to manage a sound relationship.” Chen commented.
Chen described the phenomenon of endless dating as building the foundation for a house and yet tearing it down every year. This is what is happening for those who date around without getting married.
“Celebrate Valentine’s Day with someone whom you know will be there the next year. And it will truly be a celebration of love, not a day of awkwardness.” Chen smiled.
Bestselling Author and relationship master Hellen Chen has been featured in over 200 radio, TV interviews and publications in over 18 countries.
Her next Hellen Chen’s Love Seminar will be held in Singapore on Feb 15th and in Los Angeles on March 8th. For more information, visit http://Matchmaker OfTheCentury.com.